Chick-N-Joy
1483 Queen Street East
416-461-5848
Dinner for two with beverages and tip: $15

Most death row prisoners in the United States choose fried chicken and cheeseburgers as a last meal. My family chose fried chicken and cheeseburgers as a Mother’s Day meal. Well, it was I who really made the choice. I had frequently walked by Chick-N-Joy, a Leslieville take-out. The word “Joy” in the restaurant’s name excited me with its promise of a transcendent experience. A chicken that induces feelings of joy is a chicken worth seeking out. And this would be particularly true if you were to be electrocuted in a few hours.

Well, this Mother’s Day, during our unseasonably warm weather, a picnic with my wife and daughter seemed like a perfect opportunity to sample this chicken. Now let’s be honest: fried chicken is not a ‘cool’ or sophisticated meal. You might woo a paramour with churrasco chicken or coq-au-vin. But fried chicken? Do you think you will be bedded or even taken seriously if you ply your beloved with fried chicken, macaroni salad and Dr. Pepper?And of course the spectre of the good Colonel looms over fried chicken. Across the world his avuncular, bearded image is permanently associated with that particular food. I have nothing personal against the late Colonel. As a matter of fact he was a big fan of Canada. He kept the rights to market his buckets in our dominion after he sold his American business. At least here, he realized, he could maintain his poultry-cooking standards.The Colonel also donated heavily to many charitable organizations here.

But his face has a sinister aspect now; it represents the face of relentless corporate hegemony. It is a face that smiles on a fast-food nation whose citizens who have been transformed into mindless consumer automatons by the so-called secret herbs and spices.

For thirty years family-owned Chick-N-Joy has put up an admirable resistance to the finger-licking juggernaut. Strategically located near a TTC depot, a film studio, and a public school, the family-run Chick-N-Joy has carried the banner of Canadian fried chicken sovereignty for thirty years.

The autographed eight-by-ten glossies are the first thing that strikes you inside the Joy. Chris Rock and Al Pacino are some of the A-list celebrities who sent their drivers out to get chicken here. Lesser lights like former radio host Don Daynard, Walter Gretzky (the father of Wayne), and the rock band Bush also sent stills expressing their gratitude for the food.

You can order either combinations of chicken pieces or a dinner which includes salad (macaroni, potato, cole slaw, three-bean), a bun, and gravy. Besides pressure fryers, there is also a grill here to turn out hamburgers. My wife orders one with everything on it. (She is not a chicken lover.) It’s a clean establishment and there a few stools if you want to eat inside.

We want to eat outside, though, and cross the road to the Ashbridge Estate to set up our picnic. My three pieces (breasts and thigh) are a pleasing golden colour. A generous supply of French fries spills out of the box. It’s not a bad piece of chicken at all. The portions are juicy, nicely seasoned and it’s apparent Chick-N-Joy changes its oil every five thousand kilometres. No wonder Al Pacino and Walter Gretzky like it. The fries are hand-cut and could compete with any from a fish-and-chip shop. As for the home-made gravy - it’s a striking yellow colour. Many patrons swear by it although I found it rather off-putting. My wife’s cheeseburger – she actually wanted a hamburger – is large, loaded with condiments and has a nice fresh-off-the-grill taste.

Our picnic is turning into a very agreeable excursion. You could, after all, I decide, woo your heart’s desire in such a place and with such chicken. But you will be ingesting a tremendous amount of fat. This, I can tell you, is likely to create upheavals in your bowels and then your relationship. Try baking the chicken at high heat with a creative coating. The result is fried chicken-like without so many calories.

If the relationship turns bad anyway and you end up on death row, might I suggest an order of fried chicken as a last meal. But it’s very important to be specific during these requests. Remember: it’s the three piece dinner from Toronto’s own Chick-N-Joy.